Sunday, April 6, 2008

Just Call Me "Red"

My three hour "pampering session" turned into, yet another, She who induced nightmare.

I showed up early for my appointment and started looking through books and saw several styles that I thought I might like. I figured I "might" need to cut my hair.

I was called right on time.

The gal asked what she could do for me. At that point, I let my hair down, from the bun it was in, and the poor girl gasped. The look on her face isn't one I hope to ever see again when someone is looking at me.

She quickly regained her composure and asked how I wanted to proceed. Highlights, lowlights, shaved head?

I explained what I had done and what I would like to do. Tone down the Bozo aspect and get rid of the purple/burgundy. She quickly grabbed several stylists, who all gathered around to check out my "outrageous infraction by using a box color." They touched the hair to determine the texture and condition. They consulted. I sat there feeling like a lab rat under the microscope, while they consulted on the best course of action.

It was determined that a brown tone with lots of green would take out the red and bring out a more ashy brown.

The gal slathered the hair with the evil smelling stuff and then excused herself to go make more. She finished slathering the extra stuff on the head and told me we were going to need to leave it on for a full 35 minutes.

40 minutes later we go to the wash bowl. The rinsing and head massage felt good. The silence was deafening. She puts a towel on my head and we go back to her station. The towel is removed and the silence gets even more deafening. The Bozo red is slightly toned down, but the purple was still there.

The other stylists regathered and plotted another course of action. Pull out all the color. Redeposit color. Come in every week, for the next two months, for deep conditioning and hope for the best.

I enter the conversation and said can we cut it? It took a little while for them to understand what I was saying. I finally said that I wasn't married to the long hair. I had short hair most of my life. Did I have enough of the toned down Bozo to have a decent cut without being totally bald?

Yes.

In the end I spent four hours getting a "total pampering experience", have a new BFF, who is probably terrified to ever see me again and I got a decent cut.

Totally not me, but very up-to-date. I'll learn to like it, maybe.

When Spousal Unit gets home, he can just call me "Red" and I'll call him "Sparky."

PS. The gal had the decency not to charge for the color, only the cut. I had the decency to tip her greatly for her effort.

7 comments:

She Who said...

Yes, God gave me free will and sometimes, I tend to go a little overboard.
What was once to the middle of my back hair is now a short bob in the front and not enough hair to grab in the tiny round brush in the back. I am now a walking bing cherry.

Anonymous said...

I think it is safe to say that Spousal Unit may extend his family trip a few weeks. Just for the record, he has never had problems coloring his hair, and it has never been so long as to touch his back, let alone half-way down his back.

I wonder if the weather will be good enough for sleeping in the North pasture???

krysta said...

Oy Vey! Don't you hate when you go into the hairdressers and A.) they always give you a look of disgust because you tampered with your own hair and B.) God forbid you want it short. They look at you like you are crazy then ask Are you sure because they are afraid you are going to sue them.

Kim said...

I, too, have had the three hour pampering session after I let Maddy pick out my color. A sexy deep auburn on the box translated to aubergine on my head. Not. Pretty.

dorkida said...

it is the Wee One. :)
i think you're hair is fabulous! it suits you very well... professional sassy pants.
and a 'bing cherry' could be fun, too!
(am i being 'pg' enough?)

She Who said...

Ms. Dorkita,
Thank you for your PG comment on my bing cherriness. And my pants have never been professionally sassy.

dorkida said...

i did it chicken.
i have no idea how to get to it or anything, but i blogged.

"Painting the Locker Red"

i believe you *could* wear profesionally sassy. ;p